like fish…

So here’s the story.

I have a friend (not a super close friend), whom we will call “Bruce”, even though she’s a girl.

She is in the States from Australia, and heading back home.

Beginning of July, she emailed me asking if she could stay with me “for about a week or so” until she went back to Australia, because her lease was up and she had nowhere to stay.

I agreed, because people have helped me in the past, so I figure what goes around comes around. It’s always been how I think about these things.

Well, after about a week, I asked her when she was going home. She said it would be “in a few days”.

That was two weeks ago.

Finally, today, I asked her what her plans were. Apparently there’s some screwup with her passport, but it’s “getting taken care of”, and “hopefully” she will be leaving on Wednesday, “maybe”.

I told her that she could stay until Wednesday, but if it wasn’t “taken care of”, she’d have to find someplace else to stay after then.

Am I a bad person?

~ by Matt Stratton on July 31, 2004.

6 Responses to “like fish…”

  1. FWIW I think you’ve already been exceptionally generous and have gone above and beyond the call of duty. She’s not paying rent, and you are, after all, paying the premium to live alone. AND you’re just getting back on your feet financially. So no, you’re not bad and you’ve been perfectly clear and straightforward, which is something she hasn’t.

    Out of curiousity, why “Bruce”?

  2. well, i guess it depends on how she’s acting about it. is she going out of her way to let you know how much she appreciates it? does she let you know as soon as something’s changed or do you always have to be the one to ask? those things are pretty good indications of whether she realizes you are doing her a big favor or whether she’s just sponging.

  3. She hasn’t volunteering anything – I’ve always had to ask. That’s a big part of what pisses me off.

  4. no guilt. you’ve done more than your fair share. it’s her problem for not being honest and letting you know this kind of stuff upfront. and for not helping out around the place, being appreciative, etc.

  5. It depends if she’s hot. If she is, then yes, you’re a bad person.

    Joy – he’s calling her Bruce because everyone in Australia is called Bruce.

  6. You are not a bad person. You are also not a doormat and can recognize rude behavior. I don’t know if Bruce is a bad person, poor guest or just stuck in some tough situation, but this is not a good diplomatic situation and your actions are reasonable.

    Oh yeah, I hosted a friend of a friend girl from France once. She stayed for two months and though it was getting annoying towards the end it was always a friendly and tactful situation.

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